Owen turns 1

My baby is one today and I am super emotional about it. This past year, we have been through so much together. Words can not express my joy and gratitude for his life. I have learned on a deeper level the truth that love only intensifies when there is sacrifice. My love for Owen is so strong. I love all my children equally, don't get me wrong, but with Owen, there has been tears, pain and suffering. And the sense of accomplishment, pride, joy and love I feel on this his first birthday can not be described.

When Owen was three months old, he began breaking out in these full body rashes. Eczema literally covered his whole body. My doctor told me to try the elimination diet which I did. It was funny because on Dr. Sear's website, he recommended eliminating everything at once (all the common food allergens) and then slowly reintroducing them one by one to see what it the culprit. I thought, "that's crazy, I'll just do one at a time."

Well, it turned out to be everything. Owen is allergic to everything. And that is not an exaggeration. Since I was nursing, I was having to avoid all these foods for him. I couldn't have dairy and did you know that 'no dairy' includes no cheese, butter, milk, creamer, sour cream, cream cheese, ANY cheese!!! the no dairy itself was depressing. But then there was no: eggs, soy, peanuts, tree nuts, gluten, coconut, coconut oil, oatmeal, brown rice, tomatoes, oranges, lemons, limes, nitrates, sulfites, citric acid, chicken.

And that's not all of it. He would itch against the rubber of his bib, he would itch his hands on his car seat buckles. I would have to wrap a burp cloth around his car seat buckles so he wouldn't scratch on them. He was a constant itchy mess. And I WOULD see improvement, lots of improvement when I avoided all these foods. But if I ever slipped, just the tiniest bit by mistake, he would be in so much agony. 

4 months old

6 months old

The trial and error of it all was so frustrating. So I would eliminate a food, and then 2 weeks later, have a little bit again, to see if it was a trigger. Almost every time it was, and he would be in pain. He and I cried together when I fed him a piece of chicken and he broke out in hives. He and I cried together countless times when his body was SO red and itchy and I would be carefully rubbing cream on his body. While he screamed from the pain. He and I cried together when I had some peanut butter (reintroducing it in my diet, just one time, to test and see if it was an allergy), and he was writhing in pain, and I had to give him a small dose of benedryl. 

7 months 

8 months

9 months 

And there was nothing anyone could do for us. Nothing. I researching endless hours online. I tired different things. I talked to lots of people. My doctor wasn't helpful. In March, they referred us to an allergy specialist in Hershey, PA, and our appointment was made for October 16th. They put us on the waiting list if there was an opening sooner, but there never was. Regardless, they can't do an allergy test on an infant. They do it at a year old. (So we go to the appointment next week, and I know it will be good. I am dying to find out if he has outgrown any yet! But I'm not getting my hopes up too much.....)

So end of June, beginning of July, Owen was 9 months old and I couldn't do it anymore. I couldn't eat anymore fruit, vegetables, and steak. I had lost of ton of weight, and quick frankly did not feel healthy at all. The diet was affecting so much of my life. We had to make a change. 

By the grace of God, I found a wonderful naturopath doctor through a friend's recommendation. When I called to make the appointment, the first thing she said after hearing my situation was, "I can tell this has been very hard. And I can help your son. I am confident I can heal him." 

I cried. She understood. I felt relief and so much hope.

She helped me begin the weaning process and gave me a recipe for rice milk formula. I began making rice milk from scratch and adding a bunch of vitamins and other ingredients to fortify it. Owen began thriving on the rice milk formula and I could eat again like a normal person! Although my body had essentially gone through such a detox of all those foods, that reintroducing them all at once, totally messed me up!!! My body did not like it!! haha. 

 

Seeing Owen and his soft skin today I am amazed. He is doing so so well. He is completely happy, content, adventurous, and just full of pure joy. His diet continues to be a lot of work, but seeing his good health makes it all worth it! I am in the kitchen a insane number of hours each week. I feel like I live in my kitchen. I miss the outdoors. I make him huge batches of rice milk twice a week, and all his other food I do from scratch as well. Everything has to be so pure. We have turned into such an organic family! 

But I just can't get over him. Or get enough of him. What a year it's been. Owen, I am so thankfully for your life!! I am blessed beyond measure to be your mama. I love you! Happy Birthday!

Owen the Tall

I stare at this boy in amazement every day. I'm sure anyone who reads this ol blog is getting tired of my mentioning it, but I just have to document it, for my own sake.

Did I mention he is 5 months old?

Check out those long arms and legs???

So very thankful for this boy, what gifts and blessings his life and health are!!

Our princess and a little Irish Lad

I'm a little, no, a lot excited, about this dress I just made for Hailey.

I did not tell her to pose like this. I think it was just mid twirl. 

 I was in JoAnn's and saw the pink fabric on the bolt, already like this...with the top part all ruffled and stretchy, you know what I mean? I immediately thought how easy it would be to whip it into a dress! Seams down the sides, throw on straps and done! Weeeellll......I got home and held it up to Hailey and discovered I didn't get a big enough piece! So it became like a scene out of Cinderella:

"I'll add some sleeves and a ruffle, and something for side panels"

And voila!

The sash really brings it all together. She looks so sweet in it. The simple little summer play dress I had in mind became this adorable girly frock. I told her she can wear it every day if she wants. I meant it to be a play dress since every day she wants to wear a dress. And currently, all she wants to do is hold it and look at it, and save it for church on Sunday, which if you know Hailey, is the highest form of a compliment. It's that special to her.

And this boy....what a love. 

 

Happy belated St. Patrick's Day from Owen!

4 and a half months

It just doesn't seem possible. Where has my little baby gone?

At his 4 month check up he weighed 15 and a half pounds, and is 27 and a half inches long. He is wearing 9 month clothes, and his feet are sticking out the end of his car seat ( I think I already mentioned that in another post). We all just love him to pieces. My favorite moments are when Hailey plays with him on the floor on a blanket, she talks to him and hands him different toys. He lights up whenever she comes near him. Casey, about twice a day goes up to him and says, "hiiii, hiiiii, hi." Imitating the way I coo and talk to him I think :) But then he immediately adds, "ugg-a-mugg-a" while moving his nose back and forth in front of Owen's face. It sounds strange, but it's from Daniel Tiger's Neighborhood, a kids tv show on PBS that is a cartoon carrying on the legacy of Mr. Roger's Neighborhood. It's a super cute show.

Owen is frequently in the swing while I am making dinner and will often drift off to sleep for a little cat nap. The last couples days though, he has wanted to be held. So I've been putting him in Ergo carrier. Well, it was pretty interesting trying to knead pizza dough while gentle bouncing to help lull him sleep. haha, he did fall asleep though and the pizza got made so I felt pretty good about that! And it was the sweetest thing, when he woke up after about 30 minutes, he turn his head and looked up at me and gave me the sweetest smile. I thought, how beautiful, to fall asleep in your mother's arms and wake up again in, her arms, seeing her face. I know it sounds sappy, but in that moment, his smile, reminded me how blessed I am to be a mother.

Dairy no more

At the beginning of December, Owen was dealing with a rash that was all over his entire body. He didn't have a fever or any other symptoms. It was just red, very inflamed, getting worse by the day, and so so dry. I could not get it under control. Whatever cream I put on him, his skin would drink it up and then look the same. In desperation, I called my aunt, who is my godmother, and a pediatrician. She is so knowledgeable and has seen a lot. Before I actually connected with her on the phone, I had sent her a picture text and she right away said in a voicemail she left me that she thought it looked like eczema. When we did connect on the phone later that night and she heard about what it looked like more in detail, we agreed it was eczema and she gave me a list of things to do to treat it.

-1% hydrocortizone cream

-Aveeno Baby Cream, Eczema Therapy

-no Dreft, use a free and clear laundry detergent

-no soap in his bath, just water

I was at the store first thing the next morning, picking this stuff up. Poor baby, when I first applied the hydrocortizone cream, he was in SO much pain. I just about cried with him as I gently rubbed it all over his body. I felt so bad for him. But the result the next morning was amazing. About two more applications after that, in addition to the Aveeno cream each time as well (she told me to do both at once), his skin looked brand new. I couldn't stop rubbing his soft little legs as he nursed. It was so wonderful to see him doing better. 

However, his battle with eczema is not over. My aunt also told me that something in my diet could be triggering this response. I had no idea eczema could be related to a food allergy. So in addition to the lotion and taking other possible irritants away, I did two weeks of no dairy, eggs or nuts. I know this probably helped his skin clear up so quickly and so well too. Then one by one, I reintroduced these foods. And the culprit was.....dairy. At first, I thought, ok, sure, no milk. no big deal. I like almond milk. Then about 2 seconds later, I realized, oh wait, that means no DAIRY!! No...

-cheese

-cream cheese

-blue cheese dressing

-ranch dressing

-butter

-sour cream
-yogurt`

And that's just naming a few of the most obvious. But let's just focus on no CHEESE!! Do you know how many foods we put cheese in!?!?! There's Cheddar, Parmasean, Mozzerella, American, Colby, Pepperjack, Feta....and they are all on salads, burgers, pasta, sandwiches, wraps, tacos, our family's beloved chicken wing dip, pizza!! ::::moan::::

And no butter! Well, I felt like I was saying goodbye to baking for the next year. I can't run through a list of items....its just too painful. And I just can't, can't even think about milk chocolate.

But slowly, slowly, I am learning how to substitute! And find recipes that are yummy and dairy free. It's not easy, and it's expensive, but I can once again eat chocolate chip cookies. And pancakes.  

Obviously, it's all worth it for my little man. He appears to be very sensitive too. I can't cheat or slip up at all. Even if a label says, "may contain traces of milk" he will break out. We are very curious to see if this is something he will outgrown or if this will become a way of life for him. In the meantime, I will continue to learn the ways of vegan butter, tofu sour cream, coconut milk and goat cheese. And if you know of any good recipes or websites, send them my way!

This week's recap

So on Sunday, I got mastitis. Again. Which I think means (according to what I've read) that the infection didn't really clear up completely from the first time, which was around Christmas. And yes, I did finish my whole antibiotic. Still, it came back on Sunday and despite my best efforts I wasn't able to pick up the prescription my doc called in for me till Monday morning. We don't have any 24 hour pharmacies very close to us. So that was fun to wait for. Doing much much better now.

Owen rolled over! Stomach to back, which I think is easier than back to stomach but still! He's only 3 and a half months old. And he is close to doing back to stomach. He gets so far on his side, I'm sure it won't be too much longer for that one too. We weighed him yesterday and he's 16lbs. Yup.

Luke came home today and told me that the atheist guy he has been getting to know for the last three years (and debating with over lunch ever now and then) is joining RCIA. So awesome and exciting.

Also incredibly exciting news is that for this semester Luke's lacrosse bible study is going to discuss theology of the body. They are using Dr. Ted Shri's book, "Men, Women and the Mystery of Love." Tonight while I was making dinner I was helping him come up with some good discussion questions to kind of get them thinking and start the conversation before diving into the book. Some of them were: how many of you think you will get married one day? what are some qualities you look for in a wife? what is love? what were you made for?

I'm just waiting for him to come home and tell me how it went!

Yay! I just heard the garage door! Later! :)

2 and a half months

And......going on 2yrs old. Seriously, who is this kid? He is so big, so happy, so smiley, so ticklish, so talkative....and just so BIG! I had to raise the straps of his infant car seat up to the highest level but it didn't really help all that much, because his heels are already sticking out on the bottom edge! I am in awe of this guy and so excited (partially terrified) to see what life holds for him! Will he play in the NBA? Will he need an extra long twin bed as a teen? Will I need to buy a new car seat within the next month?!?! Probably! What is your mama feeding you?! Oh wait...... :)

6 Weeks Old

Today was Owen's 6 week check up. I just realized I wrote 6 Months up in the subject line and changed it! But the funny thing is, it didn't seem that off. This child is not 6 weeks old. I mean he is, but seriously, he doesn't look it, he doesn't act like it...when he was two weeks old we took his newborn baby pictures. I don't think I ever put them up here...well then...here you are...

We had such a hard time getting him to lie down! He kept pushing himself up on his forearms/elbows!!

He is so so strong. The way his arches his back, holds his head up, kicks his legs and resists when you are changing his diaper are all incredible. And being 23 inches long at birth, those 10 lbs were stretched out, no rolls, and honestly I think it's mostly muscle! He is smiling and cooing up a storm. Yesterday I had my 6 week appointment and today was his check up. At both places, everyone was marveling over his size, alertness and smiling and cooing. He acts like a 3 month old, and looks it. I have to remind myself he is a newborn. I'm worried that by starting out so big and acting so old for his age, it's not going to slow down, if anything it will keep going and even pick up! I've never wanted time to stand still so badly. I'm eating up all his babyhood every second because I feel like if I blink I will miss it. Truly. Today at his appointment he weighed in at 13lbs, 24 1/4 inches long. I love every ounce of this big big boy!

what he is doing at this exact moment

Sweet dreams, Owen.

Owen's tears of joy

I have not been documenting about Owen nearly enough! He is such a good baby. He eats, poops, and sleeps like a machine. I have zero complaints. 

Look how long that arm is.

I have NO pictures with my baby!! This is me attempting to take one.

He is also smiling and cooing a lot now and those moments are the best part of my day. He looks at me with so much joy written all over his face. Around 1 month old babies tear ducts begin to produce tears. I always find that fascinating and notice when they begin to show. Well, the other day, Hailey was holding him in the rocking chair in Owen's room and I was leaning over both of them talking to him. His whole face was lit up with a smile and he was cooing at me. As we were talking and smiling at each other, I notice his eyes fill up with water and then as he smiled bigger and cooed more, one tear rolled down the side of his cheek. He was so overcome with happiness looking at his mama he had tears of joy. It made my eyes well up! I never want to forget that moment.